Don't You Ever Grow Up
by CupcakesOnMyConverse
Summary: "From this moment on, he would be the brother that she never had- the father she never had. Because no one should have to grow up without one." Puck will never be the father, but the least he can do is be the best big brother this world ahs ever seen.


As Puck comes through the door of his home, he checks his watch. It's 2:30 in the morning. No one will be up. He can't remember the last time he got in trouble for missing curfew. This time is different though. He wasn't home this late because he'd just smoked weed and gotten high with some of his teammates, hadn't gotten shit-faced drunk, and hadn't just banged Santana until she screamed his name. He was home at 2:30 in the morning because New Directions had lost regionals, and his daughter had just been born.

His _daughter_.

The word didn't feel as heavy as it once did. Every time he pictured her, a smile involuntarily crept onto his face. She was just so beautiful, so special, so...small. Puck shakes his head as if doing so would clear the thoughts out of his mind. He couldn't think about her like that. Not when Quinn was insisting on adoption.

He doesn't know why he wants Beth so badly. Maybe it's because his father abandoned him, and he didn't want anyone else in the world to feel that kind of pain. Maybe it's because for the first time in his life, he's sure that love exists. Maybe it's because for the first time in his life, Puck feels like he's done something right- even if Beth had been a mistake. Looking at her, holding her in his arms- he couldn't think of a single reason as to why something so...glorious...could be wrong.

As Puck walks up the stairs to his bedroom, a wave of fatigue crashes over him. He can't remember ever being this exhausted in his entire life. It wasn't just a physical thing, either. The day had been an emotional roller-coaster to say the least, and all Puck wants is to go to bed and get some much-needed rest. He doesn't even bother taking off his shoes before he flops down onto the mattress. He feels each of his muscles relax in a way that hurts so good.

Despite the fact Puck can barely keep his eyes open, he has a hard time getting to sleep. Every time he tries, his mind is bombarded with images of Quinn and Beth. Visions of Beth going home with someone other than him. Visions of her frown. That was the most painful. He never wanted his little girl to be unhappy.

Just when Puck has finally reached the edge of sleep, he hears a small voice call his name. At first he thinks he's hearing things, but the voice becomes stronger. He sits up on his elbow to see his little sister, Sarah, standing in the door-way, looking uncomfortable in her sweat pants and t-shirt.

"Noah?" she asks. "Are you awake?" This was new. Puck had never been particularly close with his sister. Not only were they two and a half years apart, but they were so incredibly different. Polar opposites. Sarah was smart, sweet, and probably had a decent future ahead of her. Puck had none of the above.

"Yeah," he mutters. "I am now. What's up, kid?" he asks. He loves her, though he'd probably never admit it. She's the thing that has kept him sane ever since his dad left the picture. He had to be strong- for Sarah. But he'd failed her. He'd made all the wrong decisions, setting the wrong example. She probably knows it- is probably ashamed of him. Still, if Puck has ever had a soft spot anyone, it would be her.

She walks further into the room, seemingly hesitant. Puck can't think of a single time his sister has ventured into his room unless it was absolutely necessary, and he doesn't blame her. The room is disgusting. He can't even remember the last time he'd cleaned it.

"I couldn't sleep, and I heard you come in. It's late. Are you okay?" she asks, and he smirks because, no, he's not okay, and this was the first time that someone had asked. It had always been all about Quinn. Because she was the victim in this situation. It's not like he had to deal with the consequences too. Nope, no responsibility was taken whatsoever. He didn't work his ass off at Linens n' Things to help pay for all the doctor's bills Quinn was constantly waving in his face. He wasn't even willing to help her raise the baby if she did decide that she wanted to keep it. Not to mention the fact that he wants to keep her more than almost anything else in the world. Nope, Puck was totally heartless. Oh. Wait.

He pats the bed, and motions for Sarah to come join him. She runs over to him, and to his surprise, cuddles up close to him. It's uncomfortable at first, since the two have never been this affectionate, but Puck eventually wraps his arms around her, holding her close. Though she'd never say it out loud, he knows that his little sister is hurting. Having a loser for an older brother and a raging alcoholic for a mother has more effect on her than she'd ever admit. Looking down into her eyes, he feels the same feeling he'd had when holding his daughter. It didn't look like he would ever get his way with Beth, but he wonders why he'd never seen Sarah as an alternative. If he couldn't have Beth, then he would be the best god-damned older brother the world has ever seen.

"You never answered me," she says, looking up at him. He smiles a tired grin at her while he thinks of an answer.

"Not really, no. But I wouldn't expect you to understand, kid."

"I'm fourteen. I'm not a kid."

"You sure are, kid. Fourteen is barely even a teenager."

"It's how old you were the first time you came home drunk," she points out. He has no response to that, because she's right and that scares him. "Quinn had the baby, didn't she?" Puck nods, and Sarah smiles in the satisfaction of being right twice in a row. That was a rare commodity when she was around Noah.

"Yup, Beth was born today. Not that it even matters," you grumble under your breath before you remember that she's still there.

"Quinn is really pretty," she says quietly, and you nod in agreement. She's more than pretty. She's beautiful. Gorgeous. Spectacularly radiant. But you don't say that out loud because A- she'd never let you live it down, and B- you don't really want to talk about it.

"Just make me a promise, kid," you say, looking down into her brown eyes. "Don't end up like me. Don't make my mistakes. You're better than that. Better than all of us. You are the one person in the Puckerman family who will amount to something in the world, so don't let that go to waste." She smiles at him- a smile so genuinely bright that it breaks his heart. No one had told her that before, even though it was so obviously true. He knew people made assumptions about her because of who he is and the trouble he's gotten into. But they shouldn't. Because Sarah, in comparison, is better than him inside and out, through and through. "You will be able to do anything you want to do. And I can make you this promise in return- I will always be there, the proudest big brother on the planet- watching you do it."

Sarah clutches her brother close to her, and he can feel her tears staining his shirt. Puck feels like a jerk, because the girl obviously has never had anyone there for her in any capacity such as this. The few minutes he'd spent in his daughter's presence today had changed him. He was going to make things right, become a better person. Starting with Sarah. Being the best big brother was just the first step.

All his life, Noah Puckerman has felt as if it was him against the world. In some ways, he still does. Even so, Puck is determined that his innocent sister who has had to grow up much too fast, and seen so much more than any fourteen-year-old pair of eyes should ever see, would never feel that way ever again. From this moment on, he would be the brother that she never had- the father she never had. Because no one should have to grow up without one.

**I always felt like Puck should have a soft-spot for his sister. In 'Grilled Cheesus', Puck mentions that "no one should have to grow up without a father". I thought he should be that male paternal-figure for her, if you will. Maybe I'm reading to much into it, but I feel that underneath his tough exterior, Puck is a big softie.**

** Anyway, please review and tell me how much you hated it :)**


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